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Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Alien Booze

Star Trekkin' across the universe can build up a mighty thirst, and there's a good chance that the dive on Rigel-5 you just entered doesn't have MGD on draft. Here are some other options.

Table I - Where

1. Venusian
2. Martian
3. Jovian
4. Saturnian
5. Mercurian
6. Plutonian
7. Neptunian
8. Denebian
9. Altairan
10. Cygnian
11. Betelgeusian
12. Polarian
13. Andromedan
14. Cetian
15. Algolian
16. Pleiadeian
17. Rigelian
18. Aldebaran
19. Antarean
20. Arcturan

Table II - Descriptor (roll 1d4 / 1d10)

1-1. Acid
1-2. Bitter
1-3. Black
1-4. Blood
1-5. Blue
1-6. Boiled
1-7. Brown
1-8. Bubbling
1-9. Copper
1-10. Crimson
2-1. Dark
2-2. Death
2-3. Dry
2-4. Fire
2-5. Fizzy
2-6. Frost
2-7. Gold
2-8. Green
2-9. Grey
2-10. Heavy
3-1. Jumping
3-2. Lite
3-3. Malt
3-4. Molten
3-5. Orange
3-6. Pale
3-7. Purple
3-8. Red
3-9. Rotting
3-10. Royal
4-1. Salt
4-2. Scarlet
4-3. Silver
4-4. Slime
4-5. Sour
4-6. Spiced
4-7. Spitting
4-8. Sweet
4-9. Viscous
4-10. Yellow

Table III - What

1. Ale
2. Beer
3. Brandy
4. Brew
5. Cider
6. Punch
7. Whiskey
8. Wine

Table IV - Possible Side Effects

01-04. Affected as though by male or female hormones (50-50 chance) - a noticeable change
05-08. Blind for 1d4 days
09-12. ESP for 24 hours
13-16. Fall in love with first person of opposite sex (or a reasonable facsimile thereof) that you see
17-20. Gain 1d10 pounds overnight
21-24. Grow dorsal fin and/or webbing between toes and fingers (or some other DNA snafu)
25-28. Hair falls out
29-32. Hair (green) grows on palms and tongue; falls out in 1d4 weeks
33-36. Hair turns blue or white or some other weird color
37-40. Increased intellect for 1d4 days, then weakened for 1d6 days
41-44. Increased strength for 1d4 days, then weakened for 1d6 days
45-48. Infravision for 1d4 days
49-52. Levitate for 24 hours
53-56. Lose 1d10 pounds overnight
57-60. Lose sense of taste for 1d4 weeks (5% chance this is permanent)
61-64. Memory loss for 1d4 days (per sitcom amnesia)
65-68. Overactive salivary glands for 1d4 days (sound like Daffy Duck)
69-72. Projectile vomiting (1d4+3 feet)
73-76. Put into highly suggestive state for 24 hours
77-80. Sleep for 1 week
81-84. Speak words in reverse order for24 hours
85-88. Temporary insanity for 1d6 days
89-92. Visited by pooka in form of green horse or pink elephant
93-96. You can see dead people
97-100. Emit highly flammable gases from every orifice for 24 hours

4 comments:

  1. Wwwhat!? No space mead?

    How's a brain to deal with the lassitudes?

    (Prefferably Syd Mead if ya got it.)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah, I missed mead. Well done. Feel free to replace punch with mead.

    ReplyDelete
  3. And folks - feel free to add-on; it was a quickie - I know it can be better.

    ReplyDelete