My Space Lover [Random Table]

Copyright Wally Wood

You’re a red-blooded starship captain. You’ve just finished kicking some alien ass and forging a star treaty with some energy beings who possess a mother lode of ioun stones, and it’s time to hit the Pleasure Planet for some R&R (i.e. rockin' and rollin'). You hit the infamous House of 7 Sins and what do you find, but …

PHYSIQUE
Roll on the body configuration table and then roll to determine skin, hair and eye coloration. When you're done, roll a few "other characteristics". And remember - this table should work equally well for males and females ...

Body Configuration (Roll d%)
01-64. Humanoid
65-79. Sex-Bot
80-89. Centaur (i.e. humanoid torso, head and arms, quadruped lower body)
90-99. Mermaid / lamia (i.e. humanoid torso, head and arms, serpentine lower body)
100. Tentacle beast (uses illusion to project more normal image – roll again; if 100, then it uses no illusions)

Skin Coloration (Roll d4)1-2. Color (see below)
3. Metal (see below)
4. Special Skin

Hair Coloration (Roll d6)
1. Bald
2-4. Color (see below)
5-6. Metal (see below)

Eye Coloration (Roll d4; 1 in 6 have eyes of different clors)
1-2. Color (see below)
3. Metal (see below)
4. Precious stones (ruby, sapphire, etc.)

Colors (Roll d12; 5% chance of a metallic version of the color)
1. Black
2. Blue
3. Brown
4. Green
5. Grey
6. Orange
7. Pink
8. Purple
9. Red
10. White
11. Yellow
12. Roll Again

Metals (Roll d3)
1. Copper
2. Gold
3. Silver

Special Skin (Roll d10)
1-4. Spots (roll again for spot color, cover D% of body)
5-8. Stripes (roll again for stripe color)
9. Two Tone (roll again for each half of body)
10. Lacks skin – just musculature and a mucus membrane to protect it

Other Physical Characteristics (roll d% as many times as you wish, or roll 1d4-1 times)
01-02. Acrobat
03-04. Amazonian (height = 1d4+6 feet)
05-06. Androgynous (hey, worked for David Bowie)
07-08. Animal characteristics (feline, snake, primate, squirrel, rodent, frog, avian, bat, canine, beetle, etc.)
09-10. Antennae
11-12. Big Anime Eyes
13-14. Bioluminescent (glow corresponds to emotions, brilliant light builds as excitement builds (blinding at orgasm), chromatophores and iridophores in skin (see cuttlefish))
15-16. Cartilage skeleton (i.e. bones not rigid)
17-18. Claws and fangs
19-20. Crab or lobster-like plates over skin
21-22. Cyclops
23-24. Dancer’s physique
25-26. Devil horns
27-28. Double-jointed
29-30. Elastic body (like Mr. Fantastic)
31. Electrically charged skin (suffer 1d6 damage at orgasm)
32-33. Faceted eyes
34-35. Frog-like tongue
36-37. Full-figured
38-39. Fur
40. Gills (needs to be submerged)
41-42. Head ridges
43-44. Hermaphrodite
45-46. Hot skin
47-48. Hypno-eyes
49-50. Instinctively changes appearance to a person from your past (illusion)
51-52. Large ears (round, pointed, etc.)
53-54. Levitation
55-56. Long, supple fingers
57-58. Mental powers (emotion control, ESP, suggestion, plant memories, remove memories)
59-60. Multiple goodies (wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more eh?)
61-62. Multiple mouths
63-64. Musk glands / pheromones
65-66. No mouth (communicates telepathically)
67-68. Oviparous
69-70. Petite (height = 1d3+1 feet)
71-72. Psychoactive sweat (narcotic, stimulant, mind control)
73-74. Ritual piercings
75-76. Scales
77-78. Serpent tongue
79-80. Siren (singing, throaty voice, purring, cooing, growling, buzzing, moaning, chanting, keening (i.e. at orgasm, shatters glass))
81-82. Spider eyes (i.e. 1d3+1 x 2 eyes)
83-84. Spines on back
85-86. Suckers on fingers (or elsewhere)
87-88. Super long hair that can be moved
89-90. Tail (1 in 4 is prehensile)
91-92. Tentacles
93-94. Vampire
95-96. Vibro-hands
97-98. Wall crawler
99-100. Webbed fingers and toes

MENTALITY (Roll d20)
1. Angry
2. Combative (mating ritual is about 50% fighting)
3. Demure
4. Desperate
5. Dominant
6. Enchanting
7. Energetic
8. Fiendish
9. Haughty and aristocratic
10. Hot and cold
11. Kinky
12. Logical
13. Morose
14. Nurturing
15. Playful
16. Predatory (5% chance kills and eats mates when completed)
17. Punk
18. Scheming
19. Seductive
20. Submissive

COMPLICATIONS (1 in 10 chance of a complication, roll d10)
1. Assassin or spy
2. Blackmail!
3. Exposed to Space Crabs! See ship’s surgeon immediately
4. Extremely fertile (90% chance of pregnancy)
5. Permanent psi-link to your mind
6. Poisonous (save or suffer some sort of damage)
7. Sex implies engagement – blaster rifle marriage forthcoming
8. Sex is like love potion, fall madly in love with her or him
9. Space princess mind controlled into working in brothel … King of Space will b pissed
10. Thief

Copyright Ken Landgraf ... sorry, couldn't resist